I've gone through that at the start of the pandemic. In hindsight it might've been my subconscious telling me that I should do something else. I had the financial means to work on stuff that I enjoyed and I didn't have to rely on employment but for.. reasons I didn't do those things. So I suggest taking a break from distractions and thinking really hard about your long term goals and how to achieve them. You might feel lethargic and not motivated precisely because you don't have a good purpose for your life. The standard "just go to work, save money, start a family" life course is not for everybody. I'm not saying you shouldn't start a family but if you have the financial means, creativity and skill to build a business of your own I believe your family life will be much better, you will have more time to spend with your kids if you have a stable source of income that doesn't require you to work 40 hours a week for and which is at risk of going away because of office politics or whatever.
If I don't feel I have control over my own life I feel exactly like you described but.. that might just be me.
Regarding your existential dread.. my philosophy as someone who is close to Ukraine and feared that the war would spill into my country, is that while it may all end tomorrow for some reason or another.. that possibility is not worth thinking about. If I really knew for certain I would die in 2 years then I'd become totally hedonistic, I'd spend all my resources to just have the most fun possible but we don't know that. Humanity has gone through worse periods than we're facing right now but it got through them so chances are we'll get through it too so why not plan for the future? I've been hedonistic for the past 7 years, it gets old. If you haven't lived your life fully until now and just dread that you've been working your ass off, not going out, not meeting people, not taking drugs or whatever other hedonistic activity you wish you had gone through then maybe go do that, get it out of your system but eventually you'll want to settle down, plan for the future and even though it's scary and your mind will throw a lot of roadblocks I feel you still have to do it to truly be fulfilled.
If I don't feel I have control over my own life I feel exactly like you described but.. that might just be me.
Regarding your existential dread.. my philosophy as someone who is close to Ukraine and feared that the war would spill into my country, is that while it may all end tomorrow for some reason or another.. that possibility is not worth thinking about. If I really knew for certain I would die in 2 years then I'd become totally hedonistic, I'd spend all my resources to just have the most fun possible but we don't know that. Humanity has gone through worse periods than we're facing right now but it got through them so chances are we'll get through it too so why not plan for the future? I've been hedonistic for the past 7 years, it gets old. If you haven't lived your life fully until now and just dread that you've been working your ass off, not going out, not meeting people, not taking drugs or whatever other hedonistic activity you wish you had gone through then maybe go do that, get it out of your system but eventually you'll want to settle down, plan for the future and even though it's scary and your mind will throw a lot of roadblocks I feel you still have to do it to truly be fulfilled.